Can We Please Stop the Shedding-for-the-Wedding Madness?

Wedding season is upon us. That time of year when we pause to celebrate couples who have promised to spend the rest of their lives with each other—two people making a vow to love each other for exactly who the other person is, top to bottom, every moment, every inch, all of it. So why do the engaged feel the sudden impulse for a complete body overhaul? The normalization of this extreme culture of #sheddingforthewedding has become alarming, with brides and grooms seeking to become shadows of themselves for their trips down the aisle, supported by an Instagram community of more than 43,000 and diet guidelines that refer to your wedding date as “that glaring deadline.” Aside from missing the point entirely, the movement is, above all things, dangerous.

“I’m not a fan of drastic measures,” says L.A.-based trainer Ramona Braganza, who, in addition to training celebrities including Jessica Alba and Jessica Biel, has helped a number of brides gain body confidence before walking down the aisle. Instead of seeing a Save the Date as a reminder to commit to a breakneck regimen of cleanses and binge workouts, she looks at a wedding as an opportunity to begin a new, healthier lifestyle of activity that you and your partner can ideally keep together. “You really want [to get to a place] where your body will be the same weight year after year,” she says.

“Diets don’t work,” agrees Manhattan-based nutritionist Amy Shapiro. “My goal with all of my clients is to teach them how to eat healthfully for the rest of their lives, no matter what situation comes their way.” She starts by cutting out common bloating and irritating offenders, including processed white breads, flour, and pastries, replacing the bad habits with fulfilling, whole nutrition.

The most important detail to consider for any kind of successful behavioral (and thus physical) change, say both experts, is time. “I really love it when I have brides who are coming to me a year or more before their wedding dates to install healthy habits that [will naturally] lose weight slowly, instead of becoming hangry while they’re preparing for their wedding,” says Shapiro. A healthy lifestyle without depravation requires “changing a lot of behaviors; that takes time,” she adds.

By building a steady routine of daily activity—whether that’s walking, finding your way into a dance class, or doing strength training to maintain muscle mass—and staying mostly on track with a nutritious meal plan, you can live a blissful diet-free life, never worrying about counting calories or fitting into your bikini. Not to mention build up the self-esteem of a person who takes care of him or herself. “There’s a reason this information has been around so long,” says Braganza. “We are all different sizes, shapes, and genetics.” Straining to resemble one ideal is dangerous. But becoming your healthiest self? To that we’ll say “I do.”

 

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